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Sinner’s Swing!

March 31, 2015

It’s been a long time since I last lived in Cincinnati, but I still spend quite a bit of time keeping track of what’s going on in the Queen City. The redevelopment of the Banks and Over the Rhine, the streetcar, A&E reality shows about a neighborhood of swingers.

Wait, what?

Yup, apparently Neighbors with Benefits is a thing. I typically avoid all reality shows like the plague, and this show will be no different, but an interesting thing happened on Twitter on Monday.

It all started with this innocuous update…


I don’t normally click on my new followers to see who they are, but how could I not investigate what the “with Benefits” meant?


Oh. Those benefits.

And then the following conversation kicked off…


For those of you keeping track at home, @DineyDress (Diana) is apparently Tony with Benefits’ wife (and the rest of their neighbors’ best friend, I bet). Tony with Benefits declares that his wife’s favorite Cincinnati Red is Pete Rose (probably because of all that hustlin’ he does), while Diana says that Tony with Benefits’ favorite player is Chris Sabo. Or, in this case, Chris Sabo’s Goggles. I’m flattered.

Note: Consider this your annual reminder that I am NOT Chris Sabo.

Amused by my inclusion in the conversation, I retweet the response that includes my Twitter handle. Tony with Benefits is VERY excited about this development.


At this point, @BenNWB joins in. Please try to keep up.


So, who’s @BenNWB?


I see. I guess this means I’m officially a swinger now. Cool.

It’s going to be a weird season.

UPDATE: MARCH 31, 2015 — 1:13 PM

My new friend Tony with Benefits responded.


The Month in Review (May): We Are Nowhere and It’s Now

June 3, 2014

In case you haven’t noticed, I’ve been paying the absolute least amount of attention possible to the Cincinnati Reds. I’m sure I’m not alone here. Either be a really bad team so I can make fun of you, or be a really good team so I can make grand, unfounded predictions. This in between stuff isn’t giving me a whole lot to work with.

Yet, I’m still keeping an eye on the score every night, but more often than not I’m relying on my game-end notifications to tell me what happened. There are only so many times you can watch those little yellow icons on base as someone strikeouts to end the inning — leaving those little yellow icons on base.

Let’s just get this over with, okay?:

1 cheese coney = This isn’t even a snack, let alone a meal. Try harder.

2 cheese coneys = You could do better, but you could also do worse.

3 cheese coneys = Now we’re getting somewhere. Not perfect, but pretty darn close.

4 cheese coneys = How can you complain about four cheese coneys? Simple–you can’t.

Read more…

Man on the Corner: An Interview with Chris Sabo

May 14, 2014


Back in 2008, as I was getting ready to launch this very Cincinnati Reds blog, I threw around a bunch of names. You’ve Got Red On You was one. So was Sean of the Red. At one point I even considered Ken Griffey’s Grotesquely Swollen Jaw.

I eventually landed on Chris Sabo’s Goggles simply because I wanted something that stood out from all of the other Cincinnati Reds blogs that had “Red” in the title. Plus, by choosing something that started with the letter “C,” I ensured that it would be listed toward the top of blog rolls. I know you hoped the name meant something more to me, but it really doesn’t.

If I can be honest, Chris Sabo is far from being my favorite player. While I enjoyed watching him play (what Reds fan of a certain age didn’t?), what drew most of us to him was that iconic accessory of his that even non-baseball fans could relate to: the goggles.

You’d be surprised — or maybe you wouldn’t — by how many people find my blog by doing a Google search for “Chris Sabo’s goggles.” Trust me, they’re not looking for my blog, they’re looking for stuff about Chris Sabo and his trusty goggles.

The fact is, for whatever reason, people still love Chris Sabo. His time in Cincinnati was short, his career unremarkable. He was part of the last Reds team to win a World Series. That surely has something to do with it, right? Reds fans can’t explain it, and even Sabo himself doesn’t understand why — over 25 years since his rookie season — people are still talking about him and his damn goggles.

I’m ashamed that it took me, the guy who facilities everything Chris Sabo’s Goggles, over six years to make this happen, but in January of this year, the stars aligned and Chris was kind enough to speak to me over the phone and answer my stupid questions.

Here you go…

Read more…

The Month in Review (April): Slow Show

May 1, 2014

It seems like only yesterday that I chose not to do a September report card for the Reds because they had just kicked off October by disappointing me. Again. Yet, here we are.

For the uninitiated:

1 cheese coney = This isn’t even a snack, let alone a meal. Try harder.

2 cheese coneys = You could do better, but you could also do worse.

3 cheese coneys = Now we’re getting somewhere. Not perfect, but pretty darn close.

4 cheese coneys = How can you complain about four cheese coneys? Simple–you can’t.

Read more…

Second Home by the Sea

April 21, 2014

The Reds have now won 189 of the last 190 games at Wrigley Field. That might not be entirely accurate, but it’s something like that.

This last week treated the Reds pretty well. They have won 5 of the last 7 games and are now in sole possession of 3rd place in the division. That stat — 5 of the last 7 — is a nice arbitrary number that makes things look pretty good. If I go back 9 games, they’ve still only won 5 games, but it’s not as impressive, so I won’t mention it.

That’s what’s awesome about stats — I can just pick a random starting and ending point, one that either plays into the Reds’ favor or makes them look bad (it just depends what I’m trying to accomplish), and then I put it up on the blog. Pretty, cool, huh? While the Reds’ struggles are far from being behind them, they appear to be turning a corner.

And even though Zach Cozart went 3-for-5 in Sunday’s game, he’s still only batting .153, so let’s hope he’s turning a corner, too.

Gimme the Prize

April 14, 2014

MLB Commish

4/15 UPDATE: Bailey and Rodriguez both exited the game before it was called, therefore, Philip Bates is the winner (Bailey, 105 pitches vs. Rodriguez, 65 pitches).

Philip, send me your mailing address when you have a chance.

The good news is that Cincinnati Reds’ starting pitchers racked up a ton of pitches over the weekend. The bad news is some of you guessed on the low-end. And the Reds lost 2 of 3… that’s bad news, too.

Johnny Cueto, Alfredo Simon, and Tony Cingrani combined for 318 pitches (Cueto accounted for 119). That means two of three winners for my contest have been determined. They are:

  • Micheal Sell (304 pitches)
  • Dean Ferguson (300 pitches)

If you can both send your mailing address to csgoggles17 (at) gmail (dot) com, I’ll get your Cincinnati Reds: 1975 World Series Collector’s Edition DVD sets shipped out to you.

But there’s a tie for the third prize between Philip Bates and BOBinCT, who both guessed 297 pitches. To break that tie, we’ll use tonight’s game against the Pirates. Rather than risk another tie, I’m randomly assigning each of you a starting pitcher. If the pitcher you’re assigned has a higher pitch count — you win. If both pitchers leave the game with the same total number of pitches, I’ll go to number of strikeouts they had. If we’re still tied after that, I’m just going to flip a coin.

  • Philip Bates: Homer Bailey (0-1, 7.71 ERA… $100 million contract)
  • BOBinCT: Wandy Rodriguez (0-2, 5.73 ERA)

(Now, before you complain about this being unfair, keep in mind that Bailey’s ERA is almost two runs higher than Rodriguez’s)

Good luck!

Mind Games

April 11, 2014


I have three copies of the Cincinnati Reds: 1975 World Series Collector’s Edition DVD set to give away, and all you have to do to win one is make a random guess about this weekend’s series against the Tampa Bay Devil Rays.

Since there will be three (3) winners, I will take the three closest answers (over or under). In the event of a tie, I’ll figure out some random way to determine the winner on Monday.


How many TOTAL PITCHES will Reds’ STARTING PITCHERS throw during the three game series against the Rays?

(STARTING PITCHER means exactly what you think it means)

Leave your answer in the comments below.  All answers must be submitted before the first pitch of Friday’s (4/11) game. Good luck!

Lastly, here’s some information about why/how I’m giving away these DVD sets…

Allowing fans to watch everything from their favorite teams and players to some of the greatest moments in Major League Baseball history anywhere a smartphone or tablet can go, MLB’s digital downloads have never been easier to attain! Until April 15, simply visit to purchase any of the specially-priced programs, including:

  • 100 Years of Wrigley Field
  • All-Time Bloopers
  • Angels Memories
  • Astros Memories: The Greatest Moments in Astros Baseball History
  • Baseball Seasons: 2004
  • Bloopers: Baseball’s Best Blunders
  • Bryce Begins
  • Detroit Tigers: Hometown Heroics
  • Fenway Park Centennial – 100 Years as the Heart of Red Sox Nation
  • Game 162
  • Letters from Jackie: The Private Thoughts of Jackie Robinson
  • Major League Baseball Official World Series Films, 1943-2013
  • Major League Baseball’s All-Century Team
  • MLB 25: Greatest Postseason Home Runs
  • New York Mets: 50 Greatest Players
  • Pride and Perseverance: The Story of the Negro Leagues
  • Prime 9 Vol. 1 (TV Episodes 9 x .5 hr)
  • Sudden Death Baseball
  • Superstars: Impact Players
  • Superstars: World Powers
  • The Best of the Home Run Derby
  • This Week in Baseball, Season. 1 (TV Episodes 17 x .5 hr)
  • World Series: History of the Fall Classic

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